How much do you weigh?
It must have been the devil who whispered that number in my ear that will forever be known as my “goal weight”, “perfect weight”, or whatever else you want to call it. You know the one i’m talking about. The weight you have always dreamed of being. The number on the scale that you long to reach one day. The number you deem as “perfect”. My STUPID number has been “the” number for so long i’m not even sure why or when I came up with it. I don’t know how I decided on that specific number or why I am was convinced that when I weighed that number it meant happiness.
120……What a stupid number. I hope I never see it again. Well maybe that’s not entierly true, but to be honest I really don’t care if I ever see it again. Want to know why? Because it is a number. A NUMBER. It is NOT ME. I am not that number. It took me over 10 years to figure out that weighing 120lbs does not define who I am. It does not determine my happiness. “HELLO Natalie WAKE UP!! Until I started to open up my ears,eyes and my mind I didn’t get the call.
My sister in law (who should be referenced more in this blog due to her countless advice over the years) gave me some advice a while back that I FINALLY ended up taking (but not without learning the hard way). The advice she gave me was not to weigh myself, and if I was going to do so, don’t do it often. I used to weigh myself every other day…and once I realized that wasn’t a good idea I limited it to once a week. Once a week seemed reasonable, it wasn’t everyday and it would help track my weight loss (or gain..eek!). The only problem was when weigh day came, if I did not see the exact results I was looking for, I immediately got discouraged and made myself feel awful. When I started making healthy changes in my life, I decided that I would wait six weeks between weighing myself. I was sure this was a great idea!
One of my inital goals was to participate in a moderate exercise program. I started by lifting weights and incorporating cardio into my daily routine. After a few weeks my body started to change, my clothes fit better, I felt better and I knew my physical routine was getting my body in better shape. I was still quite fixated on how much I weighed or how much i’d lost. I counted down every day to the six week mark. When six weeks were up I weighed myself. The number I had anticipated did not appear on the scale. Immediately my feelings of success, achievement and excitement went down the drain. Minutes before weighing myself I had felt great, I was positive, excited, feeling on top of the world. Immediately after I got off the stupid scale my attitude changed. I didn’t feel great, I didnt think I looked great, and I started doing what i’d always done. I began thinking negatively.
I soon after consulted with my psychiatristt aka husband (he’s not really a psychiatrist but it feels that way sometimes). He gave me a much needed kick in the butt. I told him how I was so upset at how much I weighed and that all my hard work was not producing any results and bla bla bla…I whined like a baby. Unlike other times in the past where he had consoled me and tried to comfort my concerns, he stopped me mid sentence and sternly said…”STOP IT NATALIE”. He continued very sternly telling me that I was being absolutely ridiculous. He reminded me that for the past six weeks I had been so happy and positive. I had been making incredible progress both mentally and physically. He told met if I was going to let the number on the scale dictate my attitude and progress that I might as well give up on the idea of change right now. As much as I wanted to be hurt that he was basically calling me a baby and telling me to quit feeling sorry for myself…I knew he was right. Why did it matter that I didn’t weigh exactly what I wanted. Was I seeing positive resluts…yes! Was I feeling better about my body…yes! Was I making healthy choices in my life…yes! Was I making positive changes…yes! Why should I care how much I weigh?
Answer: I SHOULDN”T.
Thankfully my view on my weight has changed significantly since then! I can’t say that if I gained a lot of weight I wouldn’t be bothered, or that I wouldn’t like to lose a little, but I can say i’ve made a serious committment to myself. Here it is…I will never let my weight aka that silly number on the scale have anything to do with how I view myself or my body. My focus is on making myself the best I can be….from the inside out. No number on a scale can tell me who I am or how to feel about myself….I’m in control. (take that ya stupid scale!) 🙂
When I made that committment I also decided that for me it is better if I don’t weigh myself. So i’ve stopped doing so. I have found different techniques that help me track my physical progress without weighing myself or focusing on weight loss….
- I started taking my measurements every few months
- I’ve started fun training progrms (ie. crossfit, shred, PX90) and take before and after pictures afterwards
- I’ve set strength goals (ie. I want to be able to do a pull up in the next month) …i’m so close!
- I’ve set endurance goals (ie. I want to run a 10k by the end of the year, if my back will allow)
How often do we let how much we weigh dictate the way we think and feel about ourself? I’m afraid it’s much too often. It’s not about the number on the scale or reaching your “perfect weight”, it’s about living a healthy, happy and productive life. Whether you weigh 20lbs, 120lbs, or 220lbs you are more than that number. You are not defined by how much you weigh or what your body looks like. You are defined by the thoughts, choices and actions you make on a daily basis. Your thoughts will eventually turn into your choices and your choices will create actions. What are you thinking about? Whatever your thoughts may be, do you focus those thoughts and your energy on the negative? Or do you practice positive thinking and give yourself the love and appreciation you deserve?
How much do you weigh? Do you know? Do you care? I really don’t know how much I weigh…and I really don’t care. What I do know is how I feel and that I am making healthy positive choices everyday. I also know that if I can do it…so can you. Try eliminating the things in your life that let you entertain negative thoughts. You will be surprised at how much power have. Take the wheel…you are in control.
- Do you have a “perfect weight” Or a number that you have always been trying to reach or stay at, and have you ever stopped and thought about where you came up with that number and if it is realistic?
- How do you measure personal success?
I love comments 🙂